I am a black woman raising 2 black male children. My oldest is 15 and the youngest is 3 years old. The most important job in the world to me is protecting my children, everything I do is because of them. Considering that the toddler is never in the world without me I feel I can protect him at all times but it’s quite different with a teenager who is very social and will soon be independent and going places alone. As a black woman it becomes overwhelming having to have “the talk” with my teenager over and over again. It is quite uncomfortable every time and watching the news and social media is heartbreaking. “The talk” about racism, police brutality and living in this great country, The United States of America is becoming more and more common. For us the persons of color, “United” does not exist it appears that its us vs them, there is no union there is an obvious division.
Currently the State of America is a state of fear, exhaustion, anxiety and anger for this Black Woman. I feel all of these things and it feels really heavy. I also feel helpless and hopeless when I think of my ability to protect my children as they grow older and and go out in the world alone. My 15 year old just started driver’s education and I couldn’t help but think is there a chapter in the book that discusses, Driving while being black? I am pretty sure that there isn’t and that is where the pressure came that lesson 101 falls under my umbrella of Racism, Police Brutality and being Black while living in this great country.
“The talk” is always honest. We discuss the current event if there is a video or social media post we will watch it and the discuss how it makes him feel. I believe he has to have the opportunity to share what’s on the inside and release those feelings in a healthy manner. I can then offer my insight and have an open discussion about if you ever come in contact with the police don’t make any sudden movements, Ask before you move if they ask you for something, always move slowly and keep your hands visible, never step out the care unless you are asked to do so and do exactly what they say. The worst part of this conversation is even if you follow all the rules son does that men you will always be safe? No it does not it wasn’t true for Philando, but you have to follow the rules to give yourself a fighting chance.
As a Black Woman it makes me feel like I am unable to protect my cub and even though I take the steps to train him to go out and fight what else can you do? My answer stay in constant prayer and let God be called on daily to protect and fight for your children. God bless you all!